Time Mangement: Allow Yourself to Play!

Time management seems like a pretty easy concept. However, so many people don't know how to manage their time. This can lead to last-minute plans, clumsy organization, and feeling like you are always rushed. I've always been an advocate of time-management, especially since college, when I was on my own and creating my own schedule. Everything can get done that needs to be done if you make time for it. Below are five tips I frequently use:

1. Write down everything you need to get done that day or week (depending on how busy you are) and check them off as you complete them.
   Purchase a planner or use an online calendar. This will allow you to gauge what is more of a priority and allow you to have a sense of accomplishment as certain tasks are completed.
2. Include naps, meals, and leisure time in your schedule.
   Everyone has to eat and everyone has to sleep. Including it in your schedule will make sure you have blocked out time for these important things.
3. Allow yourself to play!
   All work and no play, is no good! Make sure you give yourself the right balance so you aren't over-working and under-playing. Everyone needs time to just relax and enjoy life. If you don't enjoy yourself, what is all the hard work for? However, know when to buckle down.
4. When a big task/goal is completed, reward yourself!
   When you stick with your schedule and meet your tasks/goals by your deadline, make sure you treat yourself and enjoy the fruits of your labor. You can buy that new handbag or shoes you have had your eye on or indulge in that dessert you have been craving. It can be big or small, but tailor it to the importance of your accomplishment.
5. Don't beat yourself up about a missed deadline.
   If you are running behind schedule or are finding that you are still rushing to complete a task, re-evaluate your schedule and adjust accordingly. Maybe you only need 30 minutes to eat lunch instead of an hour or no nap time if your body doesn't need it. Just don't beat yourself up about it...work on it, learn from it, and move on.

LET'S GET IT!!

2014 Resolutions

Ok, I took a brief hiatus during the holidays, but now I'm back! I usually don't do New Year's Resolutions, but I have had a lot on my mind and felt the need to write them down and focus.

2014 is the year of finishing projects, planning better financially, and continuing to live and love life.

2014 Resolutions:

• Publish a novel (with my co-author)
• Save money consistently from each paycheck and plan long-term financial goals
• Possibly plan a trip to London and Paris in late summer/early fall.
• Laugh more (this may sound silly, but laughter is necessary and I don't do enough of it)
• Re-evaluate my hobbies (even if that means no spoken word for awhile)
• Take better care of myself (inside and out)
• Read more (I miss it so much!)
• Work seriously on paying off debt.

2014. Let's Get It!

Fashion Fridays: Outerwear

It's getting cold FAST this season! The only thing good about the cold weather for me (besides being able to cuddle up in front of a fireplace...oh and s'mores...and Christmas...ok, so there are a few good things) are the COATS and accessories!! YESSS please!!

For Ladies:

I absolutely love dress coats (or coats in the shape of a dress). They still show off your figure while keeping you warm and show the chic, girly side of you. Pair it with a cute scarf and gloves and you are set! Below are some of my favorite dress coats (I'm falling in love with yellow again).

 

My other favorite type of coat is leather! Leather coats or military jackets are timeless and are great for the milder fall/winter months. They add a little edge or create the right amount of fierce!
Note: High collars are an eye-gasm.

For the Fellas:

Pea coats all the way! There is something sophisticated and sexy about a man in a pea coat. This can be worn with jeans or a suit, collar-up or down (I like collar-popped with a cool hat...check out my dude with the light eyes. Drool. Yes, I'm married, just window-shopping). Camel (minus those ridiculous sunglasses) or gray is definitely a winner if you don't want to go with the usual black or navy blue.

Of course, leather is the best appetizer for "danger" and will turn any woman's head (think Luke Perry, "Dylan", in Beverly Hills 90210 or Grant Show, "Jake", in Melrose Place...yes, the 90s were an important decade). Remember my "layering" post? Yessss.

Bullying: The Coward's Pleasure

I absolutely HATE bullying. I'm hoping that schools and teachers are implementing no tolerance rules for bullying, but in the meantime it is nice to watch our kids and future leaders setting an example. This story warmed my heart and I hope it will warm yours too.

http://www.upworthy.com/watch-an-entire-team-of-teenage-football-players-do-something-very-unexpected

Why Do Men Fall for the 20% EVERY time??

I watch Love and Hip Hop (guilty pleasure) and several of the seasons have glamorized cheating. Stevie J with Josselyn, Joe Budden with Tahiry (although she was with him first), Kirk with a couple of random hoes in a hot tub (mind you while his wife, Rasheeda was PREGNANT with their first child together), and now Peter Gunz with Amina. I say glamorize because there doesn't seem to be any real consequences for their behavior. They cheat, it's aired on camera, they get paid, and the O.W. (Original Woman) stays with him or ends up back with him or making a fool of herself somehow. The woman always looks weak and stupid.

This boils my blood. If you are not happy with me, be honest about it, let's talk about it, and move on. Don't be a coward, give up, and dip out on the relationship, living a lie.

There doesn't seem to be any real answer for the question "Why do men cheat?" besides the annoying cop-out "...because we can", so my question is instead of going through all the effort of hiding, sneaking, lying, and ultimately getting caught anyway...why not break up with the O.W. and go with your 20%?? I loved that line in "Why Did I Get Married?" Jill Scott made all women proud!

#80/20rule

Fashion Fridays: Foot Candy!!

Y'all know I could talk about shoes ALL DAY!! But, I will try to limit myself to boots (this time).

As much as I hate to admit it, flat boots are in style this Fall/Winter season. I have big feet so wearing flat boots is just not flattering. Especially since I'm only 5'4". Short. With big feet. I look like I'm wearing flippers (at least in my head). Heels elongate my legs and make my feet look smaller (again, this may only be in my head). However, I've realized that Over-the-Knee (OTK...I love acronyms. They are the lazy way of typing or speaking and still sounding cool, unless you over-do it, lol) boots can elongate the leg too!!

 

Winning!!

Anyway, the last couple of times I went out to enjoy some nightlife or even just walking to work from the parking garage, that is all I see women wearing. No stillettos. No heels, period. If you wear heeled boots you are just towering over everyone and uncomfortable (is that what it's like to be tall?).

So...not just flat boots, but the OTK flat boot is what's happenin' right now. I can dig it.

I probably would mostly wear them with skinny jeans/pants, but I have seen some wear it with skirts/dresses.

The boots make the outfit, so the trick is to wear it with something low-key, solids (you don't want to look like you are screaming at everyone as you walk past).

In a nutshell: Leg-lengthening and oozing with sex appeal, OTK boots add instant glam; worn with mini skirts or skinny jeans, they play up your lower half, adding inches of style and miles of chic!



Poetic Interlude: In the Clouds

In the Clouds

 

I bet you think this poem is about you

Because you are

Wrapped in your own being, blinding you from seeing

That your self-consumption is keeping everyone bleeding.

Your lack of reading our minds

clouds your judgment

And you

Skip to the beat of your own drum

Walking on nine clouds the ninth one

Being the dignity I thought was mine…

You stole it.

 

See, I bet you think this poem is about you

Because you are poisoned with a head big enough

To fill the sky and that’s where it is…

You are so far from attached that

Your body parts flail uncontrollable

Like you’re drowning or falling…

As you

Toot your own horn and

Have feelings of grandeur

Your narcissism causes me to feel spiders of cynicism

Escaping my brain

 

I know you think this poem is about you 

Think you are the president when you are really

The assistant

You think you are the leader when you are really the follower’s follower

You think you are the alpha when you are the serpent

Your words pierce souls like knives in tension

Your soldiers resent you because your scent smells like something gone sour

Your laugh…no, no…your cackle makes us shudder

Get your mind out of the gutter

Because you

 

Always think this poem is about you

You think everything is about you and

You wonder why they laugh at you

They think of you as nothing but a pawn

Dude, come on

Your leadership is a joke, your words are nothing we spoke

Action reflects leadership

And we act like we lack hope

You are a thief

A stealer of happiness

You are a liar

A dishonest “other” that thinks he is higher than another

 

Your ego is a poison wrapped up in your arrogance

Seasoned with your fake intimidation

No one is scared of you

 

We are all adults, yet you treat us like your children

She is 3 and I am 2…

You think we owe you something that is past due.

The sight of you makes me pity you.

Your voice makes my ears cry.

You constantly try to control us

Leering over our shoulders like an unwanted lover

Micromanaging is your lust

You intercept our communication

And spike the ball in the core of our confidence.

 

Our fake smiles make you feel comfort

Like you are in a one-man show

When we speak

You lash us with your own words

Silence us with your mental captivity

Drown us with your beady-eyed glare.

 

Yes, this poem is about you…

But don’t feel like you have given us proof.

We talk about you like a fool. We laugh at you like a clown.

You are not a chief.

This poem is about how you let us down.

 

- M. Abla (October 2013)